Finding out the sex

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West Lothian Hibee

West Lothian Hibee

Well-Known Radge
Joined
Apr 15, 2013
20 week scan next week and fiance wants to find out the sex of the baby. I'd rather not. Any bouncers not known while their woman has? Is it possible or did you end up giving in and asking?
 
Ohhh, thats a tough one. I think you'd eventually cave and ask? It's human nature.

Why do you not want to know out of interest? My wife and I have a two month old girl and I was desperate to know what we were having before she was born so I could get prepared - paint the room an appropriate colour, buy suitable clothes etc... Dunno what I'd I've done if I had to wait until the day to find out.
 
I'd say keep it a surprise. Pink paint for girl, blue for boy is a bit 90's is it not? Also heard a couple of horror stories about scan being wrong and ensuing panic hunt out of mothercare receipts and decorators numbers.

Also the labour for a guy is pish. You sit around feeling useless seeing your Mrs in unimaginable pain, give yourself the joy of that 'it's a boy/girl' moment.

Plus you'll have countless conversations/arguments about names in next 20 weeks. You can trade off - she gets to chose girls name if you can have a wee laddie called Sauzee Whitburn.
 
I'm in a similar position with my missus mate, 20 week scan on Monday, I've already caved in though! As 2HB says from a planning perspective it does make sense, but I was quite looking forward keeping it a surprise. :baby:
 
The__Proclaimer said:
Pink paint for girl, blue for boy is a bit 90's is it not?
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We went with yellow with animal prints. Very modern :thumbgrin

It was mostly the older folk in the family who wanted us to keep it a surprise, so I assumed it to be quite an old-school point of view. Maybe not though.

I know what you mean about feeling useless during the labour. Giving her a back rub and pouring Lucozade down her gullet whilst all that is going on was like applying a plaster to a severed leg and thinking you're helping. I was only told to fuck off once though, which the midwife assured me was pretty good going.
 
Two Headed Boy said:
We went with yellow with animal prints. Very modern :thumbgrin

It was mostly the older folk in the family who wanted us to keep it a surprise, so I assumed it to be quite an old-school point of view. Maybe not though.

I know what you mean about feeling useless during the labour. Giving her a back rub and pouring Lucozade down her gullet whilst all that is going on was like applying a plaster to a severed leg and thinking you're helping. I was only told to $#@! off once though, which the midwife assured me was pretty good going.
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We went with a yellow outdoorsy theme too.

View attachment 5714

Was a boy but could imagine a wee lass rocking that room too.

It's actually a fair point about older folk and the scans - young parents are getting 3D videos of their baby floating about nevermind finding out if it's got a willy from an ultrasound. You do find older mothers nearly always say have a surprise.

On the theme of babies am I the only one completely appalled at the concept of 'baby showers'? Having a party and buying gifts for someone yet to be healthily born just seems totally wrong.
 
They sonographer won't tell you anyway,so unless you go for the 4d scan and ask to be told you won't know till its out.
We waited till birth for our three and it's more exciting waiting too see.

As @the_Proclaimer says labour ain't much fun,you constantly feel like you're in the way and to quote billy connolly it's not a spectator sport but don't miss it,seeing your child coming into the world is amazing
 
The__Proclaimer said:
We went with a yellow outdoorsy theme too.

View attachment 5714

Was a boy but could imagine a wee lass rocking that room too.

It's actually a fair point about older folk and the scans - young parents are getting 3D videos of their baby floating about nevermind finding out if it's got a willy from an ultrasound. You do find older mothers nearly always say have a surprise.

On the theme of babies am I the only one completely appalled at the concept of 'baby showers'? Having a party and buying gifts for someone yet to be healthily born just seems totally wrong.
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I never knew the sex of any of my boys before they were born. Not sure as to why buy my choice of nursery colour was Emerald Green, thought that was a perfect choice colour for boy or girl.
 
Braehead Cabbage said:
They sonographer won't tell you anyway,so unless you go for the 4d scan and ask to be told you won't know till its out.
We waited till birth for our three and it's more exciting waiting too see.

As @the_Proclaimer says labour ain't much fun,you constantly feel like you're in the way and to quote billy connolly it's not a spectator sport but don't miss it,seeing your child coming into the world is amazing
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Just stay at the top end if you ever want to look at her flange without associating it with an abattoir ever again. Made that mistake with the first.

The second (different ma) was born in the Simpson's Birthing Suite at the Royal. Absolutely beautiful - it's like a hotel.

View attachment 5715

We had a water birth there but don't think that's necessary tho. Would highly recommend it if you have the opportunity.
 
The__Proclaimer said:
Just stay at the top end if you ever want to look at her flange without associating it with an abattoir ever again. Made that mistake with the first.

The second (different ma) was born in the Simpson's Birthing Suite at the Royal. Absolutely beautiful - it's like a hotel.

View attachment 5715

We had a water birth there but don't think that's necessary tho. Would highly recommend it if you have the opportunity.
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Birthing pool is cool but did you - like me - feel an overwhelming urge to pluck baby out of the pool? My rational brain was fighting every instinct that was screaming - my baby is underwater and needs to be rescued from drowning!

Meanwhile the little dude was peacefully floating about on the end of his cord like a little astronaut on a spacewalk!

To the OP - I am in favour of keeping it a surprise. However given all the other stresses of pregnancy I'm not sure it's worth the two of you tip toeing around a secret. If your missus is intent on knowing I would give consideration as to whether you really want the additional stress of several months of guarded thought and talk.

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Pa talking of abattoirs - did you happen to go back into the pool room later on; feck me, that's a Texas chainsaw massacre sight I will never forget. (Although nothing compared to placenta and 'the show' which literally had me dry heaving!
 
egb_hibs said:
Birthing pool is cool but did you - like me - feel an overwhelming urge to pluck baby out of the pool? My rational brain was fighting every instinct that was screaming - my baby is underwater and needs to be rescued from drowning!

Meanwhile the little dude was peacefully floating about on the end of his cord like a little astronaut on a spacewalk!

To the OP - I am in favour of keeping it a surprise. However given all the other stresses of pregnancy I'm not sure it's worth the two of you tip toeing around a secret. If your missus is intent on knowing I would give consideration as to whether you really want the additional stress of several months of guarded thought and talk.
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The wee dude wasn't swimming about too long so didn't get that urge. It was the afterbirth that got me. Missed or forgot it the first time. Seeing your wife giving birth to a piece of raw chopped liver heavier than the baby mentally scarred me for life.

Typed that before your edit, glad I'm not the only one who was shocked by the scene - it was horrendous, was like an amateur dramatic group had staged Carrie in a butcher shop.
 
The__Proclaimer said:
The wee dude wasn't swimming about too long so didn't get that urge. It was the afterbirth that got me. Missed or forgot it the first time. Seeing your wife giving birth to a piece of raw chopped liver heavier than the baby mentally scarred me for life.
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Fasten your seatbelt - mate of mine ate it. Got her husband to fry it up with some herbs and stuff.

He said it was the most vile thing that has ever happened to him, and his job is cleaning up warzones.

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Whitburn Hibee said:
20 week scan next week and fiance wants to find out the sex of the baby. I'd rather not. Any bouncers not known while their woman has? Is it possible or did you end up giving in and asking?
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I expect if you're anything like me you'll cave in. No way I could go that long knowing she knew!

I'd try not to though, think it's more fun not knowing. And if you find out you have to have a scheduled cesarean (like we did) then it's weird and slightly less magical because you're like "Dave is coming on the 12th of August".
 
I don't think it's feasible for one to know and the other not to from 20 weeks. In my humble opinion you know or you don't will have to be thrashed out before. Secrets from each other at such an important part of your lives can't be a good thing. I suppose it could be delayed by asking the scanner person to put the answer in a sealed envelope.

With regard to buying clothes in preparation. They grow so bloody quickly by the time they're a month or so old they'll second or third set of babygrows and you'll have time during that period to go out and get the appropriate colour.
 
The__Proclaimer said:
Just stay at the top end if you ever want to look at her flange without associating it with an abattoir ever again. Made that mistake with the first.

The second (different ma) was born in the Simpson's Birthing Suite at the Royal. Absolutely beautiful - it's like a hotel.

View attachment 5715

We had a water birth there but don't think that's necessary tho. Would highly recommend it if you have the opportunity.
Click to expand...

I think the last time I had a decent kip in the last 3 years was on the sofa bed!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
The__Proclaimer said:
Just stay at the top end if you ever want to look at her flange without associating it with an abattoir ever again. Made that mistake with the first.
Click to expand...

egb_hibs said:
Pa talking of abattoirs - did you happen to go back into the pool room later on; feck me, that's a Texas chainsaw massacre sight I will never forget. (Although nothing compared to placenta and 'the show' which literally had me dry heaving!
Click to expand...

The__Proclaimer said:
Seeing your wife giving birth to a piece of raw chopped liver heavier than the baby mentally scarred me for life.

Typed that before your edit, glad I'm not the only one who was shocked by the scene - it was horrendous, was like an amateur dramatic group had staged Carrie in a butcher shop.
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:laff:

I wasn't there for the birth of my daughter, so I can't relate - sort of glad I wasn't now!!
 
Think I'm gonna try not know. She wants to for buying things. [MENTION=556]The__Proclaimer[/MENTION] already picked names agreed I pick boy she picks girl. Convinced her to call a boy Colin Michael Sauzee Rand. But dunno if it is a bit daft ha. Opinions?
 
Whitburn Hibee said:
Think I'm gonna try not know. She wants to for buying things. [MENTION=556]The__Proclaimer[/MENTION] already picked names agreed I pick boy she picks girl. Convinced her to call a boy Colin Michael Sauzee Rand. But dunno if it is a bit daft ha. Opinions?
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Sorry for an opinion you didn't ask for and no disrespect to your missus but I think that's the worst reason for wanting to know. As Jack says they'll be out of day one clobber in no time. Plus, a brilliant first time father experience is to go out and buy their first outfit once the the child is born. My daughter still has the tiny wee dress I bought her and it's a treasured memory for me. If you've got it all prepped in advance its all very organised and that, but be careful you don't miss some magic moments.

Ps if no be in favour of the sauzee bit, but then I am horrified by folk getting hibs tattoos
 
Whitburn Hibee said:
Think I'm gonna try not know. She wants to for buying things. [MENTION=556]The__Proclaimer[/MENTION] already picked names agreed I pick boy she picks girl. Convinced her to call a boy Colin Michael Sauzee Rand. But dunno if it is a bit daft ha. Opinions?
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Scorer of winning goal in cup final?

Fontaine Rand
Dylan Rand
Jason Rand
Tony Rand

All sound like rock stars or movie stars.
 
egb_hibs said:
Sorry for an opinion you didn't ask for and no disrespect to your missus but I think that's the worst reason for wanting to know. As Jack says they'll be out of day one clobber in no time. Plus, a brilliant first time father experience is to go out and buy their first outfit once the the child is born. My daughter still has the tiny wee dress I bought her and it's a treasured memory for me. If you've got it all prepped in advance its all very organised and that, but be careful you don't miss some magic moments.
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I agree mate. Already bought an outfit for boy and girl. My family usually do the first teddy is bought by dad. She is one of those people who just has to know not knowing would drive her mad. Hoping the baby sits so we can't see though.
 
Nah looking for middle name. Colin after me and my dad Michael after her dad and like the idea of winning goal scorer.
 
I used to work in operating theatres so the whole gory bit didn't bother me a bit.
We decorated the room in neutral colours and other bits and bobs so it didn't matter once his lordship arrived. As he got older we'd decorate his room in a theme, first it was Buzz Lightyear that had the walls painted that GREEN colour, then it was Thunderbirds when the movie came out. Had all the Tracey Island a ship extras. I even made a height chart out of plywood the shape of, and painted as, TB1.
He's 17 this year, 6 feet tall and costing me a fortune with his 'socialising' with all his friends he's met through playing with the National Youth Brass Band of Scotland. Couple that with the cost of instruments and foreign travel to perform (Norway this year), and I'm gonna have to come out of retirement.
All I'll say if best of luck to you prospective fathers and make the most of it while they're wee as it's your only chance to shape their future and their person.
 
egb_hibs said:
Sorry for an opinion you didn't ask for and no disrespect to your missus but I think that's the worst reason for wanting to know. As Jack says they'll be out of day one clobber in no time. Plus, a brilliant first time father experience is to go out and buy their first outfit once the the child is born. My daughter still has the tiny wee dress I bought her and it's a treasured memory for me. If you've got it all prepped in advance its all very organised and that, but be careful you don't miss some magic moments.
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Ah, but what about insane knitting grannies and great grannies?

My gran was a classic "Och, it should be a surprise son." The second I told her we knew, she asked what we were having, and was knitting pink wool into frilly designs like a one-woman sweatshop for the remaining 6 months. I don't think she'd have enjoyed making white unisex stuff as much.

I know what you mean about the first thing you buy though. I bought our Daisy a cuddly purple monkey the day she was born. It has keepsake written all over it.
 
Whitburn Hibee said:
Nah looking for middle name. Colin after me and my dad Michael after her dad and like the idea of winning goal scorer.
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It was a wee joke G Rand = Grand.

You have made fine choices and in my old fashioned opinion family members are a better reference than football players. I do sort of agree with wannabe though - I preferred not to give my lad my name as it felt more like giving him his own identity not to, avoiding - in your example- all the Colin jnr type thing. Just my feeling on it though .

Maybe Michael Colin rather than Colin Michael ?
 
egb_hibs said:
It was a wee joke G Rand = Grand.

You have made fine choices and in my old fashioned opinion family members are a better reference than football players. I do sort of agree with wannabe though - I preferred not to give my lad my name as it felt more like giving him his own identity not to, avoiding - in your example- all the Colin jnr type thing. Just my feeling on it though .

Maybe Michael Colin rather than Colin Michael ?
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Being honest I don't even like Michael but it's her dad's name so she wants it in. It's my oldest daughters dead beat bio dads name.

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Half asleep never even noticed grand haha.

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If mcginn scores the winner will be ideal my great grandad was john.
 
Wannabehibee said:
Just out of interest [MENTION=14080]Whitburn Hibee[/MENTION], did you know the sex of your other 2 kids before they were born?
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I knew my youngest was but not through choice their mum slipped up. And didn't meet my ex until my oldest was 3 months old.

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Should read I knew my youngest was a girl.
 
I must admit I've never really understood the point of not finding out until the birth. I get that surprises are nice but why not just have the surprise at 20 weeks?
 
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