What's in a scoring sequence?

[Seven Tattoos]

Our three league games this season against the skitter-stained underpants of Edinburgh have yielded the following results:
H 2-2, A 2-3, H 0-1.
I can only recall that sequence of scorelines happening once before in my 24 seasons as a Hibbie, and that was against Jim 'My Team Got Phucked Five One By Hibs In A Cup Final And I'm Still Spewin' About It' Jefferies's Falkirk during the 1991-92 season. Coincidentally, we also won the League Cup that season. Anyway, our fourth meeting with that Falkirk side was away, on Saturday 11 April 1992 and we won 3-2, with teenage prodigy getting amongst the goals. I hereby confidently predict that JC's Hibs, who - let's be honest - haven't really kicked a ball in the 7 weeks since that epic cup final, will urinate all over the flickering embers of the scum's lingering European hopes by the marvellous margin of 3 goals to two.

I am looking forward to it already; flying up Friday night, on the piss early on the Saturday morning, wearing pink to the game cos it's cool. Oh, and on that note (he says, digressing - as ever - slightly) I was handing out flyers for a dance club in St Mary Street on Friday (my mate's one of the DJs) and had the misfortune to bump into three pished, abusive, bigoted, aggressive hertzkuntz. When I tried to pass a flyer to one lad, he told me to 'get out of his face', I responded by explaining, calmly but firmly, that I was just doing his job. Anyway, his mate clocked ma accent and said I should batter him, well, I'm no a hardman so I just said 'mate, I'm a happy person ever since the Hibs won the League Cup'! Cue bam number one to tell me I'm a 'Fenian Leith ****' (he was an imaginative Jambo) before his mates started a chant of 'Oh, the Hi-Bees are gay' (which, after all, is sooooooooooooo last season). I just responded by telling them I'll be on the School End this coming Saturday and I'll laugh my tinyweeboaby off when we phuck their chances of Europe.

Scumbos, eh? Whether in the Scottish capital or the Welsh one they are as welcome as Enoch Powell at a race relations committee meeting.

Anyway, 'Exceeder' by Mason has just come on the radio; reminds of the party at Lix's the night before the semi, with Spender and Ferret.