Bizarre announcement in NI

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Made by a DUP minister....

Civil Service inequality back-pay

Low-paid civil servants - many Catholic and female - may receive £100m in back-pay under plans by Peter Robinson.

The finance minister said he was prepared to deal with historic inequality in pay, affecting 9,000.

He has told officials to look at the scope of the problem and engage with trade unions to resolve the issue.

He said there may be serious financial implications "but I am not prepared to follow the actions of people who preceded me and leave it unresolved".

"There should be equal pay for equal work of equal value."

The move will affect about 9,000 civil servants in the lowest grades, mostly in secretarial and administrative posts.

More than 60% of civil servants employed at the AA and AO grades are from a Catholic background.

Workers who have retired from the Civil Service in the past six years could be entitled to the back-pay, which could be up to £20,000.

The finance minister said the executive could either approach the Treasury or find the money from last year's underspend in Northern Ireland.

"Direct rule ministers did not want to touch this issue because of the enormous amount of calculations and difficulties," he said.

[Loki_Sproule]

Bugger!! I fit two of the criteria, why the hell do I not work in the Civil Service?

Strangely enough actually, when looking for a CS job the one I wanted had one of those "we're panicking a bit because we're really not supposed to know what you are, but we do, and there's too many of one and not enough of the others" bits sellotaped on to the bottom, and it wasn't for someone fitting my description. IE "applications from blah blah blah are especially welcome as we are under-represented in this area"

I'm assuming now, after reading that article, that this was because it was an administrative post and everyone else already working in said office was female. And Catholic.

Good that Peter Robinson is showing himself to be fairly human though, seeing as he's going to be our next overlord. I'm still not sure of him though, and this does little to convince me entirely. I think the man is very intelligent and, dare I say it, conniving. He also comes across as a background operator rather than a frontline loon.

There's a look in his eyes which is very cold and calculating. IMO he realises that NI won't tolerate another raving psychopath after the Paisley years and has adjusted his views and demeanour accordingly.

But then I have been accused of being cynical in the past.

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by Loki_Sproule

Bugger!! I fit two of the criteria, why the hell do I not work in the Civil Service?

Strangely enough actually, when looking for a CS job the one I wanted had one of those "we're panicking a bit because we're really not supposed to know what you are, but we do, and there's too many of one and not enough of the others" bits sellotaped on to the bottom, and it wasn't for someone fitting my description. IE "applications from blah blah blah are especially welcome as we are under-represented in this area"

I'm assuming now, after reading that article, that this was because it was an administrative post and everyone else already working in said office was female. And Catholic.

Any employer with more than a certain number of staff is supposed to ask you to fill in one of those forms (equal opportunities monitoring). The way it's supposed to work is that they use it to take a statistical measure of how their workforce is made up - they can't use it to chose one person or another, they can only make it known that they have a shortfall from one mob to encourage them to apply.

As it happens, the CS application process in NI is such an enormous, impersonal, bureaucratic arse-covering exercise that your religion, skills, common-sense or even ability to tie your own shoe-laces are pretty much irrelevant.

[Loki_Sproule]

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

Any employer with more than a certain number of staff is supposed to ask you to fill in one of those forms (equal opportunities monitoring). The way it's supposed to work is that they use it to take a statistical measure of how their workforce is made up - they can't use it to chose one person or another, they can only make it known that they have a shortfall from one mob to encourage them to apply.

As it happens, the CS application process in NI is such an enormous, impersonal, bureaucratic arse-covering exercise that your religion, skills, common-sense or even ability to tie your own shoe-laces are pretty much irrelevant.

Aye, I know. Those forms pickle my head completely, I've had to fill in about twenty so far. The bit I like is the super-duper-secret-squirrel envelope they give you to put it in, I always feel like sealing it with an official wax stamp which reads "Don't open, you're not allowed to know. If you open this an alarm will go off and inform your immediate boss. Don't open. DON'T!!"

Me post was made in a tongue in cheek way, by the way, in case you think I'm going down the Celtc paranoia route

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by Loki_Sproule

Aye, I know. Those forms pickle my head completely, I've had to fill in about twenty so far. The bit I like is the super-duper-secret-squirrel envelope they give you to put it in, I always feel like sealing it with an official wax stamp which reads "Don't open, you're not allowed to know. If you open this an alarm will go off and inform your immediate boss. Don't open. DON'T!!"

Me post was made in a tongue in cheek way, by the way, in case you think I'm going down the Celtc paranoia route

I know. But I can't resist a good rant about the CS in NI.

[Loki_Sproule]

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

I know. But I can't resist a good rant about the CS in NI.

On a similar note, you know your theory about everyone in Derry working in the CS?

Well, it appears you have been proven right.

BBC NEWS | Northern Ireland | Civil servants want to head home

[buckie]

hmmm, i spent 8 years in the Northern Ireland Civil Service and always felt my contribution to the Govt of NI was undervalued, i wonder am i entitled to anything?

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by buckie

hmmm, i spent 8 years in the Northern Ireland Civil Service and always felt my contribution to the Govt of NI was undervalued, i wonder am i entitled to anything?

Nup. Sorry - the 'one-legged black lesbian' rule applies

[buckie]

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

Nup. Sorry - the 'one-legged black lesbian' rule applies

Well im definately not a woman i will give them that one but how do they know im not a catholic, i went to a catholic primary school and the famous Cardinal Heenan RC high school in Liverpool.

[Colr]

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

"There should be equal pay for equal work of equal value."

Fecking minefield that. If not the market then who defines value of someones work and under what criteria. Same job same pay I can relate to.

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by buckie

Well im definately not a woman i will give them that one but how do they know im not a catholic, i went to a catholic primary school and the famous Cardinal Heenan RC high school in Liverpool.

They don't - you should contact NIPSA (although none of my family have ever been able to get any fcuking sense out of them).

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by Loki_Sproule

On a similar note, you know your theory about everyone in Derry working in the CS?

Well, it appears you have been proven right.

BBC NEWS | Northern Ireland | Civil servants want to head home

Everyone in Derry is a civil servant. Every last one. To a man.

It's all very well voting SF/ SDLP, but come referendum time

[TommyPreston]

Originally Posted by buckie

hmmm, i spent 8 years in the Northern Ireland Civil Service and always felt my contribution to the Govt of NI was undervalued, i wonder am i entitled to anything?

No cause you're a workshy bastard

[buckie]

Originally Posted by TommyPreston

No cause you're a workshy bastard

not my fault i dont need to work, ive been extremely lucky with the property market

[TommyPreston]

Originally Posted by buckie

not my fault i dont need to work, ive been extremely lucky with the property market

[Loki_Sproule]

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

Everyone in Derry is a civil servant. Every last one. To a man.

It's all very well voting SF/ SDLP, but come referendum time

Don't worry. By the time that rolls round we won't have to bother with those numpties, as I'll have started my own political party by then.

Although I'm slightly concerned about these Eirigi chaps who seem to have migrated up here. Still. Cross that bridge.....

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by Loki_Sproule

Don't worry. By the time that rolls round we won't have to bother with those numpties, as I'll have started my own political party by then.

Although I'm slightly concerned about these Eirigi chaps who seem to have migrated up here. Still. Cross that bridge.....

I'm going to start one myself - called the DYE (Dry Yer Eyes) party.

The basic manifesto involves removing bampot politicians, 'cammunity representatives', embittered auld dearies and various journalists of the same ilk from the BBC/ UTV evening news so I can eat my Goodfellas pizza in peace, without it going half cold while I shout obscenities at the halfwits, sumbags and traitors on t'NI news.

I'd fill the empty half hour slot with Hibs news and traditional Irish pole dancing (or even Pole dancing, I don't mind where they're from).

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by Loki_Sproule

Don't worry. By the time that rolls round we won't have to bother with those numpties, as I'll have started my own political party by then.

Although I'm slightly concerned about these Eirigi chaps who seem to have migrated up here. Still. Cross that bridge.....

Splitters

Pinko bampot republicans, I gather. Non-supportive of policing, against almost everything, big on ideaology and presumably, therefore, very, very short on ideas. Citizen Smith politics. Yawn.

[Loki_Sproule]

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

Splitters

Pinko bampot republicans, I gather. Non-supportive of policing, against almost everything, big on ideaology and presumably, therefore, very, very short on ideas. Citizen Smith politics. Yawn.

Yep, that sounds about right. A very left-wing version of the Shinners, or a party which is what the Shinners pretend to be, instead of a capitalist bunch of right-wing fascist canoots.*

Apparently a formidable enough political force in the south, however as you say very non-supportive of any form of northern policing or official authoritarian force and therefore more than likely not worth a stroke of the pen. As libertarian/republican as I am, I remember when everyone already gave the libertarian-style ideology of community/vigilante policing a go here a few years ago. It didn't go well. Although it kept the country very clean of smack for a good while.


*they do have some interesting, retro, 1979-style graffiti stylings though.

Originally Posted by Northern Ireland Hibby

I'm going to start one myself - called the DYE (Dry Yer Eyes) party.

The basic manifesto involves removing bampot politicians, 'cammunity representatives', embittered auld dearies and various journalists of the same ilk from the BBC/ UTV evening news so I can eat my Goodfellas pizza in peace, without it going half cold while I shout obscenities at the halfwits, sumbags and traitors on t'NI news.

I'd fill the empty half hour slot with Hibs news and traditional Irish pole dancing (or even Pole dancing, I don't mind where they're from).

I was thinking of doing much the same thing. Although my party was going to be called the "WYAJFU" Party (Or, The Will Ye All Just F*ck Up? Party).

Funnily, my ideas for manifesto and policy were much the same as your own, although less pizza-centred and more about permanently silencing every eejit who's nipping my ears about "themmuns". Also, on a slight tangent which is nonetheless very very important, exiling every single person who has EVER encouraged those property development/estate agent shows on TV by appearing on them. And for the presenters...well, they have a fate in store which I'm yet to legalise. I'm so sick of playing the "integrity" game when I accidentally switch on my television.

Back to our political parties. I propose we should form, unite, create a massive amount of strongholds, take out Fianna Fail (just cos I dislike them, bigoted bassas), have some sort of internal power struggle, split, argue like divorced parents over who gets to keep the policies, have a fracas about who gets what county, reach some sort of semi-acceptable resolution but remain slightly bitter about the whole thing and, eventually, move down south and run both of them from there while raking in a heap of cash.

It's what all the cool kids are doing.