Tit Monday

[TattooedHibee]

Ah, Tït Monday. It's not that far off now lads ...

That glorious day when, heading into work on the bus, cycling intae work, or sitting on the train, and you find yourself suddenly chirpier than you have been in months. You find yourself smiling at strangers again. There is a mild involuntary tumescence in your trousers that comes and goes throughout the morning with the comforting regularity of a heartbeat.

And then you get a text around lunchtime from a mate which says: "At last, Tït Monday!" And you instantly understand why you are so happy. For Tït Monday is that special day in the year when, for the first time, the temperature rises above that magical point which causes girls getting dressed in the morning to decide to show a bit of skin.

After months of dull colours and chunky knit, the world's birds suddenly dive into last summer's wardrobe (they've not had chance to buy this season's stuff) and chuck it on without a thought. Your urban landscape is suddenly lightened with acres of naked arm and leg and, after many dark months of burrowing, brëasts rising to the surface like moles at dusk.

Big brëasts in white work shirts straining at the buttons. Small brëasts bråless in vest tops, the nïpples frotted by ribby fabrics. Brëasts in summer dresses bouncing in the distance so that they catch your eye before you even notice there is someone wearing them. Brëasts nudging out from the crowd at traffic islands, quivering to cross the road...

And you know it is nearly summer. For previous generations, the arrival of spring was heralded by the sound of the first cuckoo. For us, it is Tït Monday.

Not that it always falls on a Monday. Like Easter, Tït Monday is a moveable feast. Last year it fell on a Friday. Friday 29 April, to be precise, when temperatures maxed out at 22.1C after nothing much above 16C all year. It last fell on a Monday in 2004, when temperatures leapt to 22C on 24 April.

And then, of course, there is Tït Monday Night. You see, in early summer, temperatures drop off very dramatically when night falls (Tït Friday 2005 dropped away to a parky 11.8C). But the dollies are not prepared. Slightly stunned by the morning heat, they drag out the summer clothes but forget to bring a cardie (a mistake they will not make again until next year), so that when they're all standing outside The Pear Tree after work celebrating the arrival of spring, their barely covered nïpples have no protection from the cold. It's like a Bring-and-Buy sale where everyone has brought hat pegs. It's like a prog-rock gig where, instead of lighters, everyone is holding up nïpples.

So when will Tït Monday fall this year? Will you be the first to text your mates with the announcement? Do not shoot your bolt too early. There will be false starts. There has been plenty this week alone. You will smell fresh cut grass and see a couple of early starters and feel compelled to declare Tit Monday. But your more level-headed friends will tell you to hold your horses, keep your powder dry, don't fire until you see the whites of their bra straps. I am so close to pronouncing it next week as it's edging ever so close, can you smell it lads?

But remember, as the poet said: one bold Northern slapper in a bikini doth not a summer make.

[Dub]

looking forwad to it more now than ever after you waxing lyrical there K

[PortoHibee]

The semi-season will soon be upon us :YAYYY::YAYYY::YAYYY:

[madkink]

the quicker the better, all hail tit monday:YAYYY:

[Naked Chef]

One of the lawyers I work for says he loves it when its warm enough for the girls to wear vest or t-shirts but there MUST be a slight chill in the air

[Looby-Lou]

[Greenscratch]

I have consoled myself these dark wintry days (as the fair maids have been wearing boots) with the thought : "you dirty bitch"

All hail tit monday :YAYYY:

[SG7nil]

To be fair, these days fashion seems to insist that young ladies risk a bad case of hypothermia all year round...

just wander down Lothian road at night during January to see what I mean

The skirts are so short that you can practically see icicles handing from their knickers... there's acres of belly flesh on show, and tiny strappy tops that don't hide much up top either..

However...

I suppose there is a definite difference between the average Lothian Road slapper and the nice young girlies on their way to work in their "respectable" work clobber.... and I know which ones I prefer looking at!

[SG7nil]

Heres a big nipple picture to keep you all happy until Tit Monday finally arrives officially....

http://cdnl3.liveleak.com/2/xyz34/20...0924b733595855

[Daddy'O'Hibee]

Who has the contract for blowing up these boobs, or is the modern bra padded to the hilt ? As a younger man not only did the neck get a bit stiff on the top deck of the bus going to and from work. Downside is finding out Mrs O never came to watch me play football in the summer pre season games, it was the more sun tanned and bigger boys, she says especially when they sat down, old perv.

[Zitelli`s Heid!]

Originally Posted by Daddy'O'Hibee

Who has the contract for blowing up these boobs, or is the modern bra padded to the hilt ? As a younger man not only did the neck get a bit stiff on the top deck of the bus going to and from work. Downside is finding out Mrs O never came to watch me play football in the summer pre season games, it was the more sun tanned and bigger boys, she says especially when they sat down, old perv.

All better now Daddie `o`? That must have been a sair yin.

[Daddy'O'Hibee]

Originally Posted by Zitelli`s Heid!

All better now Daddie `o`? That must have been a sair yin.

Feeling good, just a bit sore for a few days, no pain anymore. Reccomend it to anyone suffering hip pain. Off to see Newry Hibby tmrow, might squeeze a wee whisky in, nae dancin though, but then again, me and drink like a laugh.

[TattooedHibee]

Originally Posted by Daddy'O'Hibee

Feeling good, just a bit sore for a few days, no pain anymore. Reccomend it to anyone suffering hip pain. Off to see Newry Hibby tmrow, might squeeze a wee whisky in, nae dancin though, but then again, me and drink like a laugh.

Pity that 6 1 litre cartons of orange juice has been purchased for your arrival. Hope you like the pure squeezed stuff

[Daddy'O'Hibee]

Originally Posted by TattooedHibee

Pity that 6 1 litre cartons of orange juice has been purchased for your arrival. Hope you like the pure squeezed stuff

Bran, bran bran. :YAYYY:

[TattooedHibee]

Afternoon lads,
Yes, that thought your thinking now, as you gaze through that pane of glass, is correct. 2008 follows the yearly tradition of tït monday falling upon its very name. As we listen for any signs of wind in this scorching day and we ponder what could've been a great day sitting outside Ryans with a pint in hand, fear not as the weather report states its going to be Ryans bar weather all week. Be quick off the mark at lunchtimes boys, limited space will be available in princes street gardens.

Tït Monday 2008, revel in it.

[PILTONSTANY]

Originally Posted by TattooedHibee

Afternoon lads,
Yes, that thought your thinking now, as you gaze through that pane of glass, is correct. 2008 follows the yearly tradition of tït monday falling upon its very name. As we listen for any signs of wind in this scorching day and we ponder what could've been a great day sitting outside Ryans with a pint in hand, fear not as the weather report states its going to be Ryans bar weather all week. Be quick off the mark at lunchtimes boys, limited space will be available in princes street gardens.

Tït Monday 2008, revel in it.

Don't get your Ginger baws out like last night,you and Sticky boy in the same night.

Mentally scarred...........

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

Originally Posted by TattooedHibee

Ah, Tït Monday. It's not that far off now lads ...

That glorious day when, heading into work on the bus, cycling intae work, or sitting on the train, and you find yourself suddenly chirpier than you have been in months. You find yourself smiling at strangers again. There is a mild involuntary tumescence in your trousers that comes and goes throughout the morning with the comforting regularity of a heartbeat.

And then you get a text around lunchtime from a mate which says: "At last, Tït Monday!" And you instantly understand why you are so happy. For Tït Monday is that special day in the year when, for the first time, the temperature rises above that magical point which causes girls getting dressed in the morning to decide to show a bit of skin.

After months of dull colours and chunky knit, the world's birds suddenly dive into last summer's wardrobe (they've not had chance to buy this season's stuff) and chuck it on without a thought. Your urban landscape is suddenly lightened with acres of naked arm and leg and, after many dark months of burrowing, brëasts rising to the surface like moles at dusk.

Big brëasts in white work shirts straining at the buttons. Small brëasts bråless in vest tops, the nïpples frotted by ribby fabrics. Brëasts in summer dresses bouncing in the distance so that they catch your eye before you even notice there is someone wearing them. Brëasts nudging out from the crowd at traffic islands, quivering to cross the road...

And you know it is nearly summer. For previous generations, the arrival of spring was heralded by the sound of the first cuckoo. For us, it is Tït Monday.

Not that it always falls on a Monday. Like Easter, Tït Monday is a moveable feast. Last year it fell on a Friday. Friday 29 April, to be precise, when temperatures maxed out at 22.1C after nothing much above 16C all year. It last fell on a Monday in 2004, when temperatures leapt to 22C on 24 April.

And then, of course, there is Tït Monday Night. You see, in early summer, temperatures drop off very dramatically when night falls (Tït Friday 2005 dropped away to a parky 11.8C). But the dollies are not prepared. Slightly stunned by the morning heat, they drag out the summer clothes but forget to bring a cardie (a mistake they will not make again until next year), so that when they're all standing outside The Pear Tree after work celebrating the arrival of spring, their barely covered nïpples have no protection from the cold. It's like a Bring-and-Buy sale where everyone has brought hat pegs. It's like a prog-rock gig where, instead of lighters, everyone is holding up nïpples.

So when will Tït Monday fall this year? Will you be the first to text your mates with the announcement? Do not shoot your bolt too early. There will be false starts. There has been plenty this week alone. You will smell fresh cut grass and see a couple of early starters and feel compelled to declare Tit Monday. But your more level-headed friends will tell you to hold your horses, keep your powder dry, don't fire until you see the whites of their bra straps. I am so close to pronouncing it next week as it's edging ever so close, can you smell it lads?

But remember, as the poet said: one bold Northern slapper in a bikini doth not a summer make.

Magnificent post K

[brianmac]

Originally Posted by TattooedHibee

Afternoon lads,
Yes, that thought your thinking now, as you gaze through that pane of glass, is correct. 2008 follows the yearly tradition of tït monday falling upon its very name. As we listen for any signs of wind in this scorching day and we ponder what could've been a great day sitting outside Ryans with a pint in hand, fear not as the weather report states its going to be Ryans bar weather all week. Be quick off the mark at lunchtimes boys, limited space will be available in princes street gardens.

Tït Monday 2008, revel in it.

Yesterday was, indeed, Tit Monday 2008. A cornucopia of cleavage on show from Edinas fair maidens. Kinda made it worth getting up with a hangover

[Northern Ireland Hibby]

K -

Here's scientific proof of Tit Monday!

[madkink]

on leaving fife earlier today, it was shaping up to be a scorcher, however this changed, and on my return it was raining,

Standing at Dunfermline bus station, it was becoming apparant that not many people had anticipated the rain, so it wasn't unusual to find women hugging themselves in light jackets,

There was however one young lady, not bad looking walking over to the shelters, wearing jeans and a WHITE TOP:YAYYY: , needless to say she was very careless, she decided to wear a black bra but it was all good,

I then got on the bus as she returned back to where she came, some off the lads on the top deck knew her, and attracted attention in a loutish banging manner, which worked, she stopped and waved, to which a WAHAY erupted, to her embarresment

All ment in the best possible taste