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[PILTONSTANY]

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[Forzahibs]

Originally Posted by PILTONSTANY

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Deary me
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[daniel_hfc]

What is coz a can't be bothered registering?

[Hibbychick]

Topic: What happens when you get Broadband?

There's a guy coming on Saturday to install broadband on my home computer. Thing is, I have a folder full of porn tucked away, hidden in the catacombs of my computer. I really don't want this guy to find it-or even worse-my mum and dad, since I'm still at home.
So what does the guy do? Does he do anything on the computer, or does he just install wires round the back without turning it on?
Nah he searches your PC and takes a copy of all your pr0n! ;D
He could get you the jail if he finds it.
He also checks your house for all of the Porno mags you have as well ;D

Really?

He'll check the Cookies on your pc to see if you've been looking at anything naughty.

try and delete them and he'll find them in the other special folder.

You're f**ked mate

So do they actually do stuff on the computer? I thought all they did was install wires or whatever.

Aye. Think about poor Gay Glitter - not that I'm suggesting you have stuff like that, but any porn which even features an erection could see you done. He needs to install driver son your PC, so if the 'nography is tucked away you should be Ok as he might not find it.

My flatmate works for Wanadoo Broadband and lots of folk slip him £20 for 'discretion' should they find anything. That might be your best bet.

You are screwed mate, as a IT Tech, first thing I look for is hidden files and folders on peoples PCs, any pr0n then the householder gets warned and the police are informed.

He will also check for illegally downloaded music or films, so be careful. Even if you delete the files the info about them is stored in a hidden file in the registry.

You can get help here: link not working, sorry

He needs to check for memory space on the PC to install it.
If you've got a load of porn on it, then he'll see it.

pesky broadband companies. they'll steal your mousemat while you're not looking as well as finding your porno stash.

Leave him on his own for 20 mins and pass him a box of kleenex, it's the best way to buy his silence.

Oh nuts. I'm not looking forward to this. How will I go about deleting it all? And the cookies, etc, as well?
Why is having porn on your computer illegal?

Seriously though, what type of pr0n do you have?
Your best bet is to just tell the guy when he comes in, say "Mate, I have a load of pr0n on my PC, how much for you not to tell the folks/police?"

maybe if you delete everything in your documents folder that'll get rid of it.

You Dont Have Broadband But U Have Folders Full Of Porn How Do U Do It lol

Do you have a sister to offer him? I heard they accept bribes.

Same thing happened to my mate.
He has a few x rated pictures and videos tucked away, guy found them no problem.
He tried to slip him £20 but he was having none of it, called the cops and as they say.... the rest is history.

Apart from the obvious copyright problems, 'hardcore' just isn't allowed in the UK. Storing it on digital devices constitutes 'possession' as per the Obscene Publications Act 1979.
Seriously mate, it's not worth it : bung him some cash. Unless you have bestiality porn, which is so illegal even Glitter avoided it.
So, have you downloaded any animal porn?

it'll never be totally deleted off your pc they broadband dudes are sticklers i predict 3 months in a dark dingy cell

DO NOT DELETE IT!!! It will leave tell tale traces behind. You will have to go through every file and rename it to holidays001.xxx and so on.
Your best bet is to be honest and slip him £20 though,

there's a loophole in the law though saw anything involving dogs and horses is allowed.

if he finds anything just say `so what`
boot him right in the staines and chuck him oot the door

I don't have any of that, no.
I thought Glitter was downloaded child porn, and I have nothing like that. Just some from a website, and some from bearshare.
Will the guy really rat me out? So they do look on your computer? I can't exactly tell him I've got porn on it-my mum and dad would go crazy.
Is rebooting my computer an option? I've done that before and it wipes everything, except some stuff.

yes. reboot. seems like your only option mate.
Just tell him and ask how much not to tell, its usually £10 or £20 I take when it happens.

For gods sake dont reboot, then he will know something is going on!!!
We are all at it, think you are the only one with pr0n on his PC? We take a bung, we get cash and are happy, you keep your pr0n and are happy, and no one is the wiser.

I am actually shitting myself now. And I thought making the folder it was in hidden would mean no-one would find it. Can't I put a password on the folder or something?

Even reformatting the hard rive doesn't totally get rid of the evidence, only re-writing the cache thousands of times over will.
Legislation is patchy in this area, there have been no jail terms handed out but a few fines and folk put on the Sex Offenders Register.
Your best bet might be to just spill your guts to him as soon as he walks in. Confess everything and he might turn a blind eye.

He will look, unless you specifically tell him what folders are out of bounds you give him the right to search every file that is why he should either rename them, or bung him a few quid.

in all seriousness though..
it's only really BT, Telewest and NTL that prosecute…i think

How do I rewrite the cache?
Holy shit, the sex offenders register? Oh my god.
I have Rangers posters all over my room. What if he's a tim?

There's a program called Evidence Eliminator you can get that rewrites the cache, that might be the way to go. Probably get it for about £30. But again, if you're buying that it's very obvious what you've done so the shop might be suspicious.

As I say: confess, bribe or pray.
PS - You only stay on the Sex Offender's Register for 10 years so you can get a job after that.

Just Get Rid Of Ur Porn Then Download It Again With your New SUPER Fast Broadband If Your Going To Cry About It

There must be some way you can delete everything on your computer. I've had to reboot it before, and I've lost essays, videos, songs, etc. Will that not work again-if I delete everything on Windows, then reinstall it?

tell me you didnt say NTL?
good god man! You are fucked!
porn on NTL is THE worst combination of the lot

garry glitter was on NTL and he ended up in a vietnamese prison
He Was Rich As Well..Ur Done For Mate

Watch yourself, i can see you ending up in alot of bother.
Your parents will kick you out, you will live rough, and become an alkie.
all the best

Someone eventually tells him the truth

In all honesty, I really thought I was done for.
When you said I was going to be put on the sex offenders list, that really frightened me because I had just paid 30 quid for flights to the Champions League final (hence being skint), and I thought I wouldn't be allowed to leave the country.

He came, he saw, he did not find! He didn't even turn the computer on. He was a Rangers fan as well, so I think I was OK in any case.
It didn't stop me crapping myself though. I was up all night hiding it in folder after folder, renaming every video. I also cleared out a lot of the more crapper videos. Finding it would be bad, but finding that much..even worse!
Now that I've got it, it's very good. There's no-one in my house just now, so I'm just...studying.

[bumblebee]

Ah huns!

Always good for a chuckle!!!